I am Looking for Teaching Work in Kanagawa, Shizuoka or Tokyo

I would like to find more teaching work. Do you know of any? I would like to teach more on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Fridays and Saturdays.

Kevin R Burns

Iizawa 242-23, Kanagawa, Japan

Email: kevinsenglishschools@hotmail.com




English Instructor, Tokai University, Hiratsuka
Sept 2006 – Present

*Teach all levels of university students of different nationalities
*Taught various classes including TOEFL, Business English, Presentations, Film based course, writing, reading, listening and speaking

English Instructor, Keio SFC, Hiratsuka
April 2009 – April 2010

*Taught English (four skills) to grade 8 students

Owner, Head Teacher, Kevin`s English Schools, Minamiashigarashi, Kanagawa
1991 – Present

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The Matsuda Police

Matsuda Police

“But I’ve had my share of dealings with police, in the U.S., Canada, and elsewhere in the world, and there is a universal truth: when police demand submission, it’s best to submit.”
–Neil Macdonald, CBC News

The police that protect Minamiashigarashi have their main station in Matsuda.

I know they do their best. But I have some complaints, and so do others.

Quite a few people in our town feel you are rude. One of my Japanese friends
said he really doesn`t like the local police.

Why are you rude if you stop people?

Admittedly many police are not rude, but I was stopped near my friend Eiji`s house and the police were so rude to me.
I had gone to ask Eiji if he would teach me guitar again. Eiji was out unfortunately, but his wife said that he was busy
and wouldn`t be able to teach me.

I got back to my van (parked next to Iwahara Park) and the two policemen were so rude. I don`t like being stopped and questioned if it is necessary, but I think
the police should be polite and professional about it. One officer said it would be 15,000 yen for parking my car next to the park, then insinuated that I was having an
affair with my friend`s wife. Then they wanted me to cooperate and allow them to search my van, and I said no. Why should I let you? When you are so rude and insinuate
rude things and threaten me with a 15,000 yen fine when I have parked next to a park near my friend`s house.

Their strong handed attitude loses them friends, and makes people not want to cooperate.

Finally I let him search my van, but he left it all messed up. I think if they are going to search, don`t you think they should put things back properly?
Seems logical to me.

Why do so many Japanese feel the police are rude?

Police, the problem is that when you are rude, people don`t feel like helping you.

When one of the AUM Shinrikyo members was spotted the police wanted help from the public. One policeman approached me at Kaisei Station, but I avoided him because of the incident
at Iiwahara Park. I find the police scary and want nothing to do with them.

I am not alone. The local people of Minamiashigara also do not like talking with the police.

It is a shame as the people and the police should work together to help make our community safer.

But when one group is arrogant and rude, the other group doesn`t want to speak with them.

All is not bad. Some of the policemen and women are actually quite polite and professional. I was stopped for an illegal turn and they were very kind about it.
Explained what I had done wrong and gave me the ticket. Which I obviously deserved as I had made the wrong turn. But I didn`t feel bitter about it, and I hold no
negative feelings for these particular police. In fact, I would help them if they had a question about something I had seen etc.

But after a very bad experience with our local law enforcement officers, neither I nor the local Japanese feel like helping.

“Some police are bright, professional and educated. Some are louts. Some are racists. You never know which variety you’re facing.
But what they all have in common (outside Great Britain) is the weapon at their hip, and the implicit threat of its ultimate use to settle matters.”

–Neil Macdonald, CBC News

Speeding in Minamiashigara City

Many cars drive very fast throughout our city. Why?

One reason is the police rarely stop people for speeding. We have asked the police to do it on our street. But they are very inflexible.
They say it isn`t possible. It is possible in Canada, in America, and in Europe. Why is it not possible in Minamiashigara?

They are afraid to disrupt traffic they say. But they disrupt traffic when they stop people to check whether they have been drinking alcohol.

Why don`t they do they same for speeders?

Just today at 7:01 AM a white sedan went down our street at over 100 km per hour I estimated. People were out taking out the unburnable (recycled) garbage.
It could have been my child or yours going to soccer practice or whatever.

What is stopping the police from having one of them with a radar gun, or even a mounted radar gun on a stand, and one or two stopping cars, either at the side of the road, or into a parking lot of
someone who would allow this. I would at my school in Tsukahara.

But no, the police say they can`t. Meanwhile, children are killed in Minamiashigara by speeding cars.

“Most police despise any challenge to their authority. Some will abuse it, if necessary, to protect that authority, and the system can allow them to do that.”
–Neil Macdonald, CBC News

Weight Lifting

These are the workouts our friend Bret has been doing and it has really changed his physique:

Shortcut to Size

Mad Scientist Full Body Workout Plan

Another friend loves cross fit.

I want to try the above workouts sometime, but I feel my most urgent need is to lose weight. So I am going to follow the “7 Weeks Getting Ripped” program by Brett Stewart.

Australia`s Mike Littlewood in Concert in Odawara

Australia`s Mike Littlewood in Concert in Odawara

If you like Jazz, check the man out!

Spats in Odawara on this Sunday 5th October and Sundays 19th and 26th

Starting 8:00pm, charge Y500

The wonderful Kifumi will be joining me as usual to sing a few songs.

also at

GinNoIsu Cafe in Odawara on Wed 15th September. 12 noon free

At the みずほ銀行小田原 Mizuho Bank in Odawara


Odawara, Kanagawa

At the

International Basketball in Minamiashigara

International Basketball in Minamiashigara

At Kevin`s English School in Tsukahara     (Kevin`s 英会話 School 0465-74-4458)

Inoue Clinic in Minamiashigarashi

Doctors with English speaking staff in Odawara and Minamiashigarashi:

Inoue Clinic in Minamiashigarashi is near Sagaminumata Station on the Daiyuzan Line.

Gastroenterologist , Anus Surgery

Tel 0465-71-1311

Noriko is Dr. Inoue`s wife and speaks English as does Dr. Inoue.

Can do house calls.

Health Services:

- basic health checkup
– gastric cancer
-lung cancer
– colon cancer
-breast cancer
-Individual vaccination measles, rubella

-Influenza vaccine
-hepatitis B hepatitis A
-BCG Hib for cervical cancer

Check their homepage in Japanese for their Weekly Schedule:

Inoue Clinic Homepage

My Car Was Vandalized

My Car was Vandalized


I drive a nice Toyota 86 sports car and I think someone doesn`t like that fact.

I think my car has been vandalized. I used to park it well within our parking lot in an uncovered space deep in the lot with a light pole over it. But lately I park it under cover, but near a side street. We suspect some teenagers have purposely scratched it here and there over time. There are three scratches now. I have no witnesses and no proof so haven`t gone to the police. I think unfortunately someone is jealous of my car. So I will fix the scratches myself. They aren`t so bad, but I had better move the car so there aren`t any more done to it.

Letters to Terry

Dear Terry Allen, just this morning, I was shoveling snow, when a Japanese man of about 80, stopped his car and motioned me over to ask a question. “Fukabori kono chikaku ne sundeimasuka?” -was his question. Which means: Does Fukabori live around here? But being a Tsawwassen guy of course, I thought he was mouthing me off, and I only caught:
“Fuka-bori!” So I thought the 80 year old was trying to pick a fight with me! “Fuka-bori to you too buddy! And your mother too!!!” I wanted to say, but resisted the urge considering the guy`s age and the fact I mean, his mother was probably long gone! Sorry to say. He was an old coger! “The war`s over!” Was another one I thought of. Instead I referred him to my lovely natto eating wife Ikumi, and she promptly directed him to the fish store across the street. Terry if you have never lived across a narrow street from a fish store for 16 years, I`ll tell ya, the aroma is very interesting! It becomes that much more of a challenge to make friends as the smell permeates your clothes. But I have a lot of friends who enjoy sushi, so that is a definite plus! Terry if your wife doesn`t eat natto, you are missing something buddy! Natto is fermented; or I like to think, practically rotten soy beans.
They make a kind of long stinky string as you eat them. I think it could double as an industrial strength glue for airplane parts It makes for a romance made in Odawara, I`ll tell ya man. Take care! Sorry you lost your hockey team again! Maybe someone can scrounge up another hockey team for Atlanta. Or maybe it could be one of them Kickstarter projects. It`s always a thought! Your buddy in Nippon, Kevin R Burns

I Love People Smoking Next to Me!



I Love People Smoking Next to Me

Originally published in The Vancouver Sun

Tokyo:Japan Living (JL)

God I love people smoking next to me! Japan is a great country for a guy like me. I love the smell on my clothes and my hair. I don’t smoke myself, I don’t need to. I get enough when I go to any movie theatre lobby, restaurant or coffee shop here. It’s a great place for smoke inhalation.

I may become a fireman because of this Land of the Rising Smoke. I miss the Marlborough man–he died of lung cancer long ago; too bad. His young virile image is here though–on many billboards and blasting from Sony TV’s throughout the land. Don’t tell anyone he died of lung cancer eh! Many people don’t seem to know. And many famous stars from America make great cigarette ads here. I guess people like Charlie Sheen agree with me, that Japan is a great country and that everyone should smoke.

I don’t smoke, and I never had asthma in Canada, I developed it here in Japan. Silly Canadians and their non-smoking cities. How could I ever develop a challenging disease like asthma in a largely smoke free city like Vancouver! And how do they expect to attract any new smokers if they don’t let the big tobacco giants advertise! How ludicrous! No I’m glad I moved here!

I think those Canadians are too health conscious! No smoking in public, come on! What will they do next, make Canadian store clerks polite? Make them get off the phones with their friends and actually serve the customers?

It’s neat going to the hospital here. The one I go to specializes in asthma treatment! The doctor is very famous and he smokes in front of his patients–yes that’s right, right in the hospital lobby.

Oh it’s great, I don’t even have to move, I get smoke blown in my face by my own doctor! I don’t even pay extra! It’s a free service.

And thank God he never runs out of cigarettes, there are two cigarette vending machines right in the hospital!!!! You have to like that!

I confess, I was so distraught that all the airlines here have wimped out and banned smoking on all international flights. Something to do with foreign pressure.

Oh well, I can still smell the stench in the elevators, taxi cabs,and on my friend’s clothes too. It’s great that the Japanese government feels like I do. They think,

“The people need their cigarettes!” So they own the whole company.They are kind of like a Bill Gates of Tobacco. They stare down from the Diet Building and are happy in knowing that Japan Tobacco is making cigarettes for the Japanese masses.

There is no discrimination here about smoking. They are available to everyone! Even children can buy them, as there are vending machines all over the country. No one can supervise it so anyone with the Yen to smoke can do so! Konnichiwa Tobacco!I see students smoking everywhere. The people hack on the trains, and it isn’t just from colds you know; Japan Tobacco can be thanked for that. Plus JT is reducing the population here. Japan is pretty overpopulated anyway–one study said that over 100,000 Japanese died from tobacco related illnesses in 1995 alone! Wow! It’s strange as that seems to go against the whole plan. Japanese always worry about the declining population but don’t seem to do much to curb smoking. I am forever grateful that the Japanese aren’t that health conscious!

They even smoke while holding their babies! Yes, life is good here!

Oh smell my sweater…I think that aroma is Lucky Strike!

“I Love People Smoking next to me!” was originally published in The Vancouver Sun, on Wednesday, January 17th, 2001

“Do you mind if I smoke? No. Do you mind if I fart?”

–Steve Martin

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